All your houses are bugged you dumb assholes everyone right now should be scouring the internet to find someone to come over and do a thorough examination. I thought I I was totally safe jerking off on my living room couch while watching porn until I I got an email from Mike pence offering me as his personal chef so I can serve him up a big plate of that “HOT DICK”–his words I dunno what that guy’s deal is but he must have sent my info to his buddies because now I’ve got Mitch McConnell, Lindsey Garha,and Rick Santorm crowding up my inbox calling me “angle” and and asking if I can come over to stuff them like a Russin ballot box. Anyway I’m pretty sure my Xbox Kinect has been spying on me so I put a pice of tape over the camera and now I keep getting text messages from the Catholic Church telling me to remove the tape.i had no idea so many people are trying to watch me whack off in the privacy of my own home! I found a camera in my shower and when I threw it out Kevin spacey hurled a brick through my window.I mean dont take my word for it, just ask Mitt Romney who somehow got remote access to my 3D printer and keeps printing out sex dolls of himself for me to fuck with the words “closest I’ll let myself get ” etched around the rim of his asshole these politicians are sick of they think America’s gonna put up with obvious abuse of civil rights. Just the other day I was jerking off to a hot threesome scene when Obama popped into the corner of the video and started giving me stroking advice. What the fuck people is this how you want to live??? Fight back and get your home checked for bugs,and next time Jerry Falwell’s dead ghost sends you pictures of his taint saying “hey wanna lock snakes ?” You tell him NO. NO JERRY FALWELL’S GHOST FUCK YOU. SO GET YOUR HOUSES CHECKED YOU FOOLS