I fucking hate cheese. People put cheese on everything. Cheese on salad. Cheese on chips. Cheese INSIDE my motherfucking sausage. When I spend my money on meat, I want it to be meat, not some lowlife dairy substitute.

The taste of cheese is mediocre at best, but the fact that everyone overuses it on everything makes me hate the taste. So many perfectly good meals are ruined by putting that grungy demon material onto it. When you put cheese on something, it takes up so much of the taste you cant even taste what it was. The problem to something not tasting good, is just to add cheese. And what’s worse? You know what people love more than cheese? Gooey cheese. I want my food to be solid, not some yellow goo that pretends to be solid but is actually an alien sludge from the planet Keppler 29474. I hate how it strings out and the string trails from your lips onto your shirt and pants, and you can feel the cold slimy ass shit on your lips. At that point, you’ve got two options. Either suck the alien tapeworm up into your mouth and revel in the slime, and gag it down, or try to pinch the ever expanding string off and have it lay with your spit on the plate. Fuck cheese, I fucking hate cheese.