No, you’re NOT into astrology.

I’m so sick of all these people who think they’re into astrology. No, you’re not. Most of you are not close to being into astrology. I see some of these people saying “I know all my friends’ sun signs!” That’s nothing, most of us know their rising, their Chiron, and all of their sacred geometry and retrogrades. I see people who only know their big three and claim to be into astrology. Come talk to me when you can recite your entire composition of conjunctions, trines, sextiles, and transits then we can be friends.

Also DEAR ALL MALES: Masculine energy is NOT intuitive. Men are not good psychics. Men are not to be trusted with anyone’s chart. Men cannot be into astrology. Men should leave the intuiting to the females (WITH ABUNDANT FEMININE ENERGY IN THEIR CHARTS).

SUN SIGN ASTROLOGY. IS. NOT. REAL. ASTROLOGY. Put down baby’s first astrology lesson and start working on reciting all of your friends’ and families’ birth times by heart.

Imagine thinking you’re ACTUALLY into astrology.

– Sincerely all ACTUAL astrologers