Shrek: “Onions… have… layers. Ogres have layers. Onions have layers… You GET it! We both have layers.”

Donkey: “OHHH, you both have LAYERS. You know, not everybody likes onions. CAKE! Everybody loves cake! Cakes have layers-”

Shrek (stops walking): “Layers…”

Donkey: “Yeah, yeah, that’s what I’m saying, just like Cakes! Or, you know what ELSE everybody likes? Parfaits!”

Shrek (turns to face Donkey): “… Layers…”

Donkey: “EXACTLY! You get it. Have you ever met a person, you say, ‘Let’s get some parfait,’ they say, ‘Hell no, I don’t like no parfait.’? Parfaits are delicious!”

Shrek (now boasting a thousand yard stare): “… LAYERS…”

Donkey: “Uh… Yeah, that’s what I’ve been saying, glad we’re on the same page here.”

(Shrek holds his stare)

Donkey: “Uhhh… Shrek?”

(Shrek turns his unnerving stare down from the horizon toward Donkey): “… LAYERS, Donkey…”

Donkey (assuming he’s joking): “Heh heh, okay. Okay, Shrek. We get it. Quit playing with me now.”

(Shrek begins walking slowly toward Donkey)

Donkey: “Shrek? Shrek, seriously, okay. We had a nice bonding moment, it’s over. Let’s just move on now, right?”

Shrek (begins peeling light-green colored patches of skin off his face): “… LAYYYERRRSSS.”

Donkey (talking faster, fear in his eyes): “Sh-shr-shre-Shrek? You, uhhh… You do that often, huh? I uhhh (chuckles nervously), I didn’t know. Didn’t know that, wow. So, uh, ogres molt too? Or, is that just a personal skin condition? ‘Cause you know, I know a guy, makes this marvelous skin cream. Or, is it shedding from some bad sunburn, huh? Should we find some cool shade?”

Shrek (beginning to pull bits of flesh from deeper layers of his face, dark green ogre blood oozing from his exposed muscle tissues): “… LLLAYYYERRRSSS…”

Donkey (panicking as Shrek extends his giant, bloody ogre hands out to grab him): “Oh, whoa, WHOA, NOOOO, SHREK- !!!”

(Shrek picks up the now hysterical Donkey in a bear hug, holding him close to his partially mutilated face)

Donkey (flailing in terror): “OHHH, OHHHHHHH GODDD!!!! (manages to lift a hoof to smack Shrek across the cheek)

(Shrek grins as globs of flesh begin falling from the cheek Donkey struck, revealing seemingly endless sections of bone underneath, Donkey continuing to scream in futility as the rest of the face gradually disconnects from its supporting tissues)

Donkey (crying in horror): “NOOOOOOOOOO, SHREK! I’M SORRY!!! NO MORE CAKES, NO MORE PARFAITS!!!! PLEASE, SHREK!!!!!”

(Shrek tightens his vice grip as he stares into Donkey’s soul, his eyeballs oozing out like jelly, his teeth falling out like dominos as his boney grin widens. Fangs grow where his ogre teeth previously were, his flesh melting to bloody pulp all over his body. From beneath that rotting green mess, new monstrous skin begins growing atop the skeleton as the joints all contort)

(Donkey can no longer muster the strength to scream, the strength of the beefy arms crushing his ribs against his lungs)

Shrek (speaking in a demonic voice as his jaw unhinges like a snake): “THERE IS NO SHREK, ONLY… LLLAAAYYYEEERRRSSS!”