I had a boss who used to work construction. One day he’s working on an unfinished house and really needs to take a shit. It was towards the end of the build so the porta potties that are usually on site for the workers had already been hauled away. He has no time to go drive to a bathroom; this shit is coming now.

So despite it being considered unprofessional, he says fuck it and takes a shit in the house’s master bathroom toilet. Does his business, is feeling much better, goes to flush, and … There’s no water in the tank. Plumbing has been shut off for some reason. He can’t flush the giant turd sitting in the toilet.

He can hear other workers downstairs. He knows the new homeowners are scheduled to stop by soon. He’s going to be discovered. He panics. Looks around, finds a piece of scrap wood, uses it to fish the turd out of the toilet. There’s a small window just above the toilet; perfect, he thinks. He opens the window and tosses out the turd.

… straight onto the air conditioning unit two floors down. One of those big ones with the giant oscillating fans on top. And the AC just happens to be running at the moment…

That shit hit that fan… and EXPLODED. Shit was flung in every direction, on the nearby building materials, on the house’s siding, damn even some on one of the other contractor’s truck parked nearby.

Yeah. He had a lot of cleaning up and a lot of apologizing to do that afternoon.

Usually shit hits the fan figuratively. But that afternoon, it was all too literal.