I, like everyone else here, am still shocked and outraged by the murder of cummy. The admins have gone way too far this time. While cummy can never be replaced, nor can the injustice be undone, I have a list of 10 requests, nay, demands for the reddit admin team. If they do not fulfill these demands within 1 week, I will get my dad, who knows bill gates, to ban them from Xbox live. Here are my demands:

1. Hand over control of reddit to the users of r/copypasta. Or more specifically, me, because I am very cool and my mom says I’m very mature for my age.

2. Have cummy be named a saint in all denominations of Christendom

3. Publicly apologize for your actions and admit that you are all dum-dum stinky heads who are also gay (but not in the funny haha mods gay way)

4. Get my parents back together

5. Pay reparations in the form of 100,000 v-bucks, and the skull trooper skin to every r/copypasta user

6. Solve the Israel/Palestine dispute (note: I will not accept any two state solutions, you must also submit a four page essay justifying your decision; be sure to site your sources in text, as well as in a bibliography)

7. Free Hong Kong

8. End racism worldwide

9. Colonize and terraform Mars to be more earth-like. Then give me control of the planet because I think it would be cool to have my own planet

10. Bring cummy back from the dead


So there you go team reddit those are my demands you have 1 week to meet all of them.