The good old days was when I was in college getting shitfaced every night at my frat, beating the shit out of people, and banging all of the members of the sorority. Not to brag but I still do most of that stuff because I’ve retained my wild side. Even though I’m in my mid 30s I look 19 and have retained all of my youthful features due to good genetics even though my parents are just ugly as shit, so it goes without saying that I can pull chicks pretty easily. I get into bar fights pretty much every night, because I guess people just love fucking with me but they almost always perish. I was at the bar last night and got into a scuffle with some hood dude after he fucking spit on me. I stood up, towering over him and was like “bro really do you want to do this?” and out of nowhere I pulled a nice righty hook to his temple and dropped him. Sorry for the ramble, but I want to share my life since so much crazy shit happens in it every single day. My life would make a great action/thriller film.