Okay, I know that most people are horny for Cynthia, I get that. But take a moment, and picture this:

You come home from a long, hard day. Work kicked your ass harder than your wife Cynthia did all those years ago. And speaking of Cynthia, when she came to greet you at the door, she noticed how… well, miserable you looked. She immediately sits you down on the sofa, and bringing you the dinner she had made. As you eat, and rant about how shit your day was, she simply has a sad look in her eyes. When you finish eating, and lay flat on the couch, face down, she puts a blanket over you, and gives you the warmest, most loving hug she could, while also kissing your forehead, and saying in a soft, soothing, almost mother-like voice:

“It’s going to be okay, dear. Life is always throwing new things at you, and yet, you continue to push through, and come out of them stronger from them each and every time. It’s so inspiring, and a lot of people are proud of you. Myself at the forefront of it.”

There. I know that we’re all a bunch of lustful degenerates, but for a moment, let’s think about our waifus being kind, and caring to us, rather than just mere thoughts of reproduction.