This is how it would go down. First of all, I’d defraud and thieve a massive amount of money from North Korea in a cyber attack they were not expecting. They’d chase me there, hunt me down, the forces directed by that chubby little leader they’ve got King-Yong-Pung-Ill or whatever they’ve got I don’t even know his name but he looks like a fat teletubby with big floppy hair with bangs hanging down. Anyway they hunt me down, I’m walking down a darkened street one night, their forces, undercover, clandestine take me on the street, they think they’ve overpowered me. They have no idea I am absolutely capable of physically dominating every single one of them. I allow myself to be taken. They take me in the middle of the night and I am flown away to North Korea. As soon as I am within sight distance of Kim-yoong or whatever his name is, I break out of my shackles. They were not expecting it. I run up to that horrible little despotic leader and full on to his face a plant a magnificent headbutt with my massive head. This headbutt fells him, he is dead in one fell swoop. I’ve released and freed the whole country of North Korea. They elect ME their new leader. It doesn’t stop there. North Korea is only one of the three countries that the Rothschild do not own and control their central bank. They send over some emissaries, the whole of the illuminati pack is sent over to try take control of the central bank. They think I’m going to give it to them because I’m a westerner. Absolutely not. I’m ready for them when they come. I take every single one of them down with a sword. Then I unleash a secret weapon I’ve been developing. It closely mimics the kind of effects of a solar flare and it WIPES out the electronics on the whole of the world. They are no longer able to use them. ALL modern weapons systems everything is no longer usable. We are back in the stone ages, no one knows what’s going to happen. I take my little North Korean bands I’ve been training secretly in this time in sword play, cloak, dagger, shields, sword, we’ve been training, it’s going to be like a medieval battle. We march our way across Asia, more and more people joining every single day and I’m training them with swords. We march our way into Germany and this is where the Final Confrontation happens. The last of the New World Order have re-banded around David Cameron. He’s been elected the new leader of the Free World. Well “Free World” my arse. He has bought his forces, no guns or anything because they’re all useless because of my new weapon which has rendered them useless. There is going to be a battle of old. It takes place in an old gothic German castle. It is snowing down, it’s like Game of Thrones. They’re expecting just some bloke but they don’t know I’ve been training EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. with a sword carved out of granite. I’m fighting my way through the forces just SMASH, SMASH, SMASH. Noone can get close to me. The song of steel upon steel is RINGING out across the castle. I spot David Cameron and his fat, smug, revolting little face. I make one final charge towards him. And before his forces can stop me, I throw my sword. It’s like the final scene out of 300. I use it like a spear and it flies through the air. Everyone stops, everyone is watching it go through the snowflakes which are coming down and it lands in David Cameron’s eye. POP He is gone, he is dead. It has happened. The new world order has been broken. Everybody wants me to be the new leader. I step aside. I won’t do it. I turn off my weapon system, the electronics are back up and I say “now is up to you world, you will re-build. And you need to do it the right way otherwise I’ll be coming back”.
That is the perfect crime in my eyes.