Edit: Well this backfired. But since everyone wants to know how it happened, I’ll say it.

I just felt a fart coming on, so I let it out, and my ass got wet. I immediately book it to the bathroom while trying to have the shit make as little contact with my ass as possible, and I use the bathroom to try to finish myself off, clean off my underwear as good as I can, throw it in with the laundry, and change.

It’s not super interesting, I know, but people wanted to know, so I thought I’d tell them.