Dear Beautiful lovely Margaret,

I am deeply scarred and hurt by my actions. I am a complete douche jerk fart lowlife scum scrotum face because only a douche jerk fart lowlife scum scrotum face would be profoundly idiotic enough to even for a single moment stop being a loud and proud SUPER SIMP for the most impossibly beautiful, funny, smart, quirky, charming, cute, adorable, admirable, capable, large hearted, insightfully artistic, poetically perfect person in all existence, especially considering how ravishingly sculpted, stunningly pretty, infinitely snuggly and godly gorgeous your physical existence is.

Please accept my humble apology.

Your faithful Simplord,
Mordecai