Jime and Jackmans’ diary.

By: Mayhem834

Jackman entry 1

I went to kohls today and used some of the kohls kash i have accumulated over the years. I was walking home with my bags full of random items i found at kohls when suddenly there was a blinding white light and a chrome man (that i assume is from the future) appeared in front of me. “Jime is a butt.” he said with such elegance that i almost melted then he grabbed my arm and dragged me away before i could ask who jime is. I was blinded by a light once more. When it faded i was alone in a chrome room and i wondered to myself where the man went when suddenly i heard a voice say “I bet you are wondering who i am and who jime is.” I replied “yes” then i felt a hand grasp my shoulder it was the chrome man. That’s when i realized i couldn’t see him because he blended into the room. “I am satn and jime is a young childish boy who steals writing utensil, and is also a butt” he spoke with such a calming tone that jime is a butt. End of entry one

Jime entry 1

Today was a bad day. As i was in class i stole some pencils and the teacher gave me detention. He made me write “i am a butt on the board 300,0 times. when i finished he allowed me to leave. “Heck i missed the bus” i said as i walked outside. it was dark i must have been there for almost 4 hours. “satn bring me Jackman” i said. A few moments later my chrome pet appeared in a blinding white light holding a disheveled young man who i knew to be Jackman. “Hello” i said with a shaky voice it was hard to keep a calm composure when faced with my hero. Jackman spoke thus “ you must be jime” i replied excitedly “yes that is me”. Jackmans grew angry “ you are such a butt” he yelled “stealing writing utensils is wrong, you disgust me.”. I fell to my knees defeated. Being scolded by your hero is just about the worst thing i can think of. I’ll talk to him tomorrow but now i need to sleep. End of entry 1

Jackman entry 2

After i called Jime a butt he fell to his knees and stayed there for a few minutes then got up and waved his hand then we were back in the chrome room. I might have hurt his feeling but that wasn’t my intention i just needed to know that what he was doing was wrong. Anyway i am gonna see what i can get out of the chrome man. I looked around for about 3 minutes and then i said his name “satn”. “Yes” he replied “where and when are we” i asked him “we are in the room in the year 42069” he replied “why was i brought here” i asked he replied with”because jime needs your help.” then he disappeared and left me to stew in my thoughts. But the joke’s on him i don’t stew i soup so i’m gonna think of some things to ask jime next time i see him before i go to sleep. End of entry 2

Jime entry 2

When i woke up i found a fresh pair of clothes on my bed. I wondered who had put that there but then i remembered that i had a small robot who does those things for me. His name is jeremy and he is about 3 feet tall he does my chores. I got up and got dressed and left for school. I must have waited at the bus stop for an hour before i realized it was saturday. So i called satn and told him to bring jackman. A few seconds later he appeared holding jackman by the collar of shirt. “You beckoned?” he says in his smooth voice that sounds like the smell of lemonade. “Yes i needed you to bring jackman to me so we can talk” i say very-matter-of-factly. He sits there silently he must still be mad at me for stealing those writing utensils. I send him back with satn and i’ll try to talk to him again in a few days. End of entry 2.

Jackman entry 3

I was sent back with satn and as we arrived in the chrome chamber meant only for the damned and imprisoned i feel a presence unlike any other. I hear satn say “how did you get in here” but before he can engage this strange presence i hear the words that shake me to my very core the reverb in his voice shakes the chamber “Be gone thot.”. As my vision comes back to me i open my eyes. I remember what satn told me “if your eyes are closed during transport you will be temporarily blinded upon arrival.” i see no one in the chrome room but i feel him creeping behind me his very presence paralyzes me with fear it is none other than oobectu the god of citizenship. He is close now i can feel his hot breath on the back of my neck. He quietly utters one word that fills me with a sense of dread as the word echoes in my head “deported.”. End of entry 3

Jime entry 3

This morning i woke and called upon Satn but i found it strange that he did not come when called upon. I found this odd because when I acquired his service from his home on the 15th planet from the sun he signed a contract. This contract stated that he would come when called upon unless he was incapable or dead. This gave me a terrible feeling because i left jackman with him. Which means he was in danger. I mumble quietly to myself “i am such a butt” as i search for my teleporter. Without Satn it was the only way to get to the chrome room. I find the teleporter under a stack of clothes. I grab it and enter the coordinates in the year 42069 coordinates are not just longitudinal and latitudinal but also liddentudinal since we have some cities and areas in the air we needed to add a third dimension to the globe. When i arrived in the chrome room the entire room was burnt. The wall mostly black with scorch marks. I knew only one thing was capable of doing this “oobectu”. End of entry 3

Jackman entry 4

I awoke in a barren hellscape, or at least that’s how it seemed. The land was barren and gray the sky was a dark gray like the clouds before rain. I knew it wasn’t going rain because that feeling just wasn’t in the air. It was hot and not even a little humid. The air was dry and despite there being no sun in the sky, the sky glowed a soft gray, and it felt like the sun was shining directly on you. I couldn’t see anything on the horizon, it was like i had been dropped in the middle of the desert. I was isolated, nothing in sight. So i started walking, after all what else could i do. It’s not like the fornite battle bus was gonna save me and whisk me back to my own time, and place. So i walked and i kept walking stopping only to check my surroundings. When i had walked what seemed like miles and nothing changed, that is when i decided that this was indeed hell. End of entry 4

Jime entry 4

After seeing the chrome room in such a state and coming to the conclusion that oobectu was at fault i knew that there were only a few places Jackman could be heaven, hell, or purgatory. The Angels have a thing about not letting the living into heaven so i can’t even check there. That left just two places left to check. Hell is a very unpleasant place for the living to go so i decided that was going to be the last stop on my list. Purgatory, the place souls go when they cant get into heaven but aren’t damned to hell, that is where i’ll check. As i get ready for my trip to purgatory i check things i need off my list. I’m ready to die, whereas heaven and hell the living can enter , if allowed, only the souls can get into purgatory, good thing i have a guy for that. As long as the body stays intact the soul can re-enter the body after the mission has been completed. But before i go i need to… End of entry 4

Jackman entry 5

I had been walking all day, or so it seemed. I had no way of knowing but i got a feeling that night never came in this land. With no timepiece on my person i had no way of knowing how long i had been walking. On the horizon i saw something but i couldn’t be sure what it was all that i knew was that it was moving toward me. It was growing bigger by the minute. It looked like a posse of men riding horses way off in the distance with heat distortion, like in almost every cowboy movie. I continued toward them hoping they could tell me where i was as they got closer i could see what they were. They were spooky scary skeletons riding upon hellmounts. Something was off, these were not your everyday Mr.Bones calcium skeletons something was wrong. It was almost like they were they were ground to dust and held together by hate. The dust shifting like the mantle of the earth, around the skeletons was an aura like their spirit surrounded the bones keeping them from falling apart. They were almost upon me now it didn’t occur to me that i might be in danger until now. I ran… end of entry 5

Jime entry 5

I entered purgatory, in purgatory your spirit feels like your physical body due to the fact that the spectral plane matches the state of your spirit. I looked around and tried to get my bearings, i looked to my left and saw jackman but i also heard the thunderous rumple of hooves. Roughly 250 men on horses galloped behind him. It was the band of the alamo, they were in a state of a decay. In purgatory your spirits state is directly represented by who remember you. They were being forgotten. I called out to jackman “remember the alamo”. My voice seemed tiny in comparison to the thunder of horse hooves. I needed to get closer so i ran towards him when i was about 15 feet away he turned his head to look at me and i heard him shout “help me” almost as if on autopilot i yelled back “what do you think i’m doing here jackass”. On a list of thing to say to your hero that would be at the bottom. Through the noise i shouted “remember the alamo” he looked at me quizzically and said “fuck you, what does that have to do with anything”. Before i answered his question i needed to set one thing straight “Watch your fucking language”. End of entry 5

Jackman entry 6

He wants me to watch my language, that’s rich, he started it. Anyway i need to remember the alamo i guess, i don’t know much about it “The most i know about the alamo is a song by marty robbins” i call to Jime he responds “That should be enough just remember it”. I do as Im told i remember what i can, colonel travis, texas, indian scout, bravery, and something about being outnumbered. Nothing changes and i’m still unsure about how that was supposed to help. My legs are getting tired i can’t run for much longer. I yell to Jime “ nothing is happe..” my word are halted by ring of a gunshot. I hear it before i feel it. In my calf is a hole about about the size of a baseball in diameter. As i go to make my next step i fall and i call out to jime who was already getting ready to face the entire army from the alamo he draws a gun, old fashioned revolver and yells “it’s high noon” as he shoots every spirit off their hellmounts. When he had finished he came over to me and I asked him why he hadn’t done that right off the bat and he says

“dramatic effect”. If i hadn’t been crippled i would have gotten up and slapped him. End of entry 6

Jime entry 6

Really everyone’s a critic, dramatic effect is important. After all, i did just save him, but do i get a thank you nooooo it’s all “why didn’t you do that before i got shot in the leg”, honestly. I grabbed the pill i need to transport Jackmans spirit out of here, the clone i made of him should be finished growing by now. When jackman consumed the pill his spirit will be drawn inside and i can transport him easier. I messaged my guy telling him the the mission was completed and he brought me back to my body. I put the pill with jackman into the clone i made of him and in a couple minutes he came to. “Where is the wound on my leg” he asks me “ it’s not like i’m complaining though i’m just curious” i give him his answer “ when you are wounded as a spirit your body is not affected” this answer seems to be enough to satisfy him. Now that i’ve brought him back i need to go get a new servant. End of entry 6

Jackman entry 7

Jime said that we were going to go find him a new servant today. I’m not sure what that entails but what i do know is i miss my cat. His name is bongo cat and he is able to play any instrument perfectly. I wish he had been taken with me. I’m gonna ask jime if we can go back and get him. First i need to understand what exactly is going on, and where i am. I looked around the room to see if i could make heads or tails out of anything. It seemed to be some kind of laboratory with gadgets and doo dads strewn about, maybe a couple wigwams here and there. “Wigwams are a type of indian housing” i hear a voice say, it’s almost as if they can read my mind, i turn around and see an older man in a lab coat. I leer at him and say “i’ve heard it both ways” while he says at the same time “no you haven’t”. I believe that he may be psychic. Like shawn spencer except not fake. I’m really not sure what to make of this. I’m about to ask him who he is and how exactly he is doing that but before i can he says to me he says to me he says “my name is Dr.Pepper, i am an inventor” as he is taking off his hat. He walk over and shows me the inside of his hat which was lined with wires and other electric looking stuff. “What is all that?” i ask and he goes on to explain neural networks and how the hat reads brain waves or something, i don’t know. When he finishes explaining his hat Jime calls me over a says “satn is gone so we need to go and enslave another member of his race” this disturbs me for more than a few reasons but i go along with it for the time being.

Jime entry 7

We use Dr.peppers teleporter to get down to ground level. I bring jackman over to my car and we both get in, jackman says “shotgun” even though no one else is getting in the car. I drive and talk, as i tell Jackman about what we have to do i can see the visible confusion on his face and he says to me “I feel a DISTURBance in the force”, which i can tell is a reference to something but i can’t tell what. I explain to him how satn is part of a race of extra-terrestrial humanoids that inhabit the mantle of the earth. He squints at me and tilts and says “Aren’t extra-terrestrials aliens” and explain to him “since we found these humanoids in the earth we have started calling aliens off-worlders because these humanoid creature are EXTRA- terrestrial”. He seems to understand what i mean so i continue explaining what we are gonna do. I tell him that these extra-terrestrials call themselves the grounders and their society is the underground. The grounders are forced to remain in their place unless they are under employment of an overworlder. “We don’t actually pay the grounders since they consider being above ground ‘payment enough’” i tell him. Jackman looks relieved and says to me “im glad that we aren’t actually enslaving anyone, that would make you a giant butt”. As we make our way to the transport chain that leads to the underground i remember that the entrance is guarded and jackman does not have a legal 42069 ID. we make the detour to the DMV and wait in line for like an hour. Jackman turns to me and says “ you think that the DMV would be faster in the future”. I just kinda shrug and we continue to wait. After about another hour it’s our turn and jackman gets his ID. We head back to the entrance to the underground to pick out our very own pet grounder. End of entry 7

Jackman entry 8

Jime said we were going to the underground and that is where we went after a long stop at the DMV. I got an ID and jime said that we were already to go. We got on this thing that was much like a ski lift except i was the size of a bus. The descended for almost 3 hours i couldn’t tell exactly how fat we were going but it was fast. When we got to the bottom the conductor made us put on this spray he said “it will keep you from melting” which sounded pretty good to me . i applied the spray and it was actually ice cold, though the feeling did not linger. I saw outside the bus was what looked like another city filled with grounders, but they didn’t all look like satn some were metal, some were gems, and some were just plain stone. The gems were the coolest by far and i asked jime “why did you pick satn if the gems look so much cooler?” and he explained to me “the more rare that the material that the grounder is made of the harder the are to tame. Satn was made of common steel and was about all i could handle” which confused me “if they want to come above ground why do you need to tame them?” he thought for a moment and said “they want to come above ground but they also want to be free”. I asked jime how taming works and he said that you place your thumb upon their third eye and basically break their mind in order to make them complacent, if you don’t succeed then you try a different one. We stepped off the bus and jime said i could look around while he goes to find one that suits him. I was alone in a market square looking area. There where people selling all sorts on minerals and gems, i dont want to think about where they came from. The scene did not look unlike the market from aladdin. On the other side of the market i see a deep red gem grounder and decide to test my luck. End of entry 8

Jime enrty 8

I felt bad about leaving jackman in the time square of the underworld, but this was something that i needed to do on my own. As i wandered through the winding streets of the underworld, scanning every grounder i encountered, i became increasingly nervous that i would not find one that suited me. I rounded a corner and saw a larger man shaped grounder that was even more chrome than satn. I entered stealth mode which meant i was walking weird and would 100% be seen by anyone who looked. In my stealth walk i snuck up on this chrome “man”. I jumped up on his back and put my thumb on his third eye as he exclaimed “hey”. The process of taming a grounder is really simple, there are two parts, while in their mind you relive their most important moments in their body and you alter their memory, and while in their mind you fight them as them. I jumped on him and experienced his most important memory. I was walking into a house with a tan stone exterior and large four pane window left of the door. Looking through the window i could see a dining room with a full table minus one empty chair. There was five other grounders gathered at the table, an burly older male with a steel mustache and sideburns, an older iron woman with kind features was bringing a pot of food to the table, and three younger children all of which looked metallic. I open the door and enter the house, upon my entrance i can look around the home and i see a den and stairs leading up to what i would assume are the bedrooms. I walk into the dining room and i am greeted by all of them saying that they didn’t expect me home this early. I tell them “i lost my job at the foundry today” the mood immediately becomes more somber. The one i assume to be the mother say “i didn’t want you working there anyway, melting our people isn’t a job for a smart boy like you” i’m about to object and say that we need the money but i decide against it. We had been silent for a few seconds before the doorbell ring and i move to answer it, before i can move my mother puts the pot down, tells me to sit, and says she can answer the door. Before i can object she has moved more than halfway to the door so i take my seat. We wait for my mother to get back but instead we hear an electric crackle and the sound of a iron body hitting the floor. my father tells me “ watch the kids” as he goes to see what is happening. As he approaches the door two me rush him, dressed in all black, and strike him with a stun baton. The children scream, which alerts the intruders to our presence and as the begin to approach us the memory ends. End of entry 8

Jackman entry 8