If he tried that on me, I’d quickly grab the door with my hand (I’m very strong (I played high school football (5 touchdowns in 1 game (yes, you reeded that correctly)))) so it wouldn’t be able to move, then jump out of my seat and ram through the doors and chase him down, jump on his feeble little body (I’m pretty big and manly), and smash his face into the ground until he returned whatever it is he tried to steel from me. Then once he did that, I’d slam his head into the ground some more until he apologized and promised to never do it again. I’m just a hero like that, it comes naturally to a football legend me.

**COMMENT ALTERATION #☝️:** I just came back from chasing down someone who tried to dognap our dog (after punching him hard in both of his eyes (they both got black immediately), I threatened him so hard that he ran up a tree like a cat (ironic for someone trying to steel a dog (lol (laugh out loud (abbreviation for lol (for clarity (your welcome))))))) and I’m downloaded?! This is nuts, I have *never* been downloaded in my entire life on the Rebbit, and suddenly I get all of these downloads? It must be the jealousy from those touchdowns of mine, I can’t blame peeple. It’s just such an amazing feet of humanity that it’s bound to attract the jealous types.