I just pictured a black and white slow motion video of a guy with a blanket over his shoulders, sitting on his couch. A narrator says “Watch, this man’s trying to raise the roof with a conventional blanket”. The man puts his hands in the air, like he just doesn’t care, and the blanket slips and falls off his back. Be bows his head in shame and a giant red X is superimposed over the video, accompanied by a buzzer sound.
After that black and white clip, we then see Brett Favre sitting on his couch with a Deluxe Snuggy on. This time the video is in color and unlike the virgin blanket owner who sits alone in darkness, we see the chad sports ball champion sits with a wife, two kids and a Golden Retriever on his couch. Each of his fellow humans also has a Deluxe Snuggy, the familial unit collectively raises the roof and the human spirit is lifted by witnessing it.
After a quick camera cut we see Brett Favre holding a football. He looks into the camera and with much warmth and good will he speaks, “Everyone in my family loves their Snuggys, and now even my Golden Receiver has one!”, he then turns and tosses the ball, the camera turns revealing the Golden Retreiver from the couch (remember him, I didn’t mention him for no reason), he’s walks up and drops the football from his mouth, (he presumably caught it off camera), he does in fact wear a novelty dog sized Snuggy.
At this point I stop picturing this commercial. I then contemplate the following questions; why do I not own a Snuggy? Who is Brett Favre? Am I by not owning a Snuggy somehow contributing to the decay of western civilization and some how supporting a communist take over of the good ol’ U.S.A.?
There’s no time to ponder these questions, there is only time to go forth and acquire a sufficient amount of Snuggies to protect my loved ones and pets from the ever encroaching nefariousness of witchcraft and Communism.
I’m doing my part… are you?