Sun shines, grass grows, birds fly, and brother, Gordon Freeman is a bitchass motherfucker. He put my game on hold. That’s right. He pulled his fancy ass VR headset out and put TF2 on hold, and he said his crowbar was THIS BIG, and I said that’s disgusting. So I’m making a callout post on my Twitter.com. Gordon Freeman, you’ve got a freakin puny ass dong. It’s the size of this FLAIR! pin except waaaayy smaller. And guess what? He’s what my dong looks like. That’s right, sweetlips. All bats, no physguns, no barnacles. Look at that. It looks like 2 baseballs and an Atomizer. He put my game on hold, so I’m going to put his resistance on hold. That’s right sweet cakes. MY SUPER BONK PISS! Except I’m not going to piss on the resistance. I’m gonna go higher. I’M PISSING ON VALVE HQ! How do you like that, GABEN?! I PISSED ON VALVE HQ, IDIOT! You have 23 hours until the piss droplets hit the game’s code holding computer. Now get out of the park before I piss on you too!