in response to [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/dankmemes/comments/e6ic16/wahoo/)

mario is gay as fuck, and most probably for bowser. let me explain. first off, mario always chases after princess peach, but peach is never the end goal. in every version of the game his endgame is being able to come into physical contact with bowser. all of the happiness in that mans life comes from the rush of blood to his dick whenever he touches bowser´s scaly skin. secondly, mario is a small man. what does that have to do with anything you ma be asking? he´s a submissive, and he needs a big boy to dominate him. peach is thicc and all but she doesn´t seem like the dominatrix type. however, bowser is a kinky boy, i dont think anybody can argue. plus, he has a look of sheer terror while looking at the peach coochie. while im on the subject, look at that chad in the back. luigi is so damn chad, so straight, he isn´t even risking looking up and seeing toads man cooch, and he definitely doesn´t want to see mario´s swamp ass crotch. he is the most alpha of chads, and gets as much cooch as he asks for, while mario is a beta male cuck. this concludes my ted talk