Despite the saying “he has huge balls”, Having big testicles suck

I know this sounds like a shit post but hear me out. I have large testicles. It is not a gift. I have a massive bulge that is very hard to hide. I’ve been harassed because of it. I sit on them sometimes. They are like a huge target to everything. For example, when I get home from work. My dog is just the perfect height that when she jumps on me for lovins, she decks me in the jewels every time. It has become a problem honestly. Now for the worst part. The insecurity. I have an average sized dong that I am not at all mad about. It does the job and does it well. The part that sucks is the bulge. Some people see it and assume I have a horse cock. It makes it embarrassing when I finally get a home run with a lady and she looks disappointed. I am very sorry for the inappropriate post. It is my biggest insecurity and my daily hell and the only person I can talk to about it is my current girlfriend.