Look, I don’t wanna sound like a pre-ejac dick here, but there is no ladder out there that would ever impress me. In my opinion, a ladder isn’t even really a ladder until someone climbs it, and when someone does climb it, I’m impressed by the climber, not the ladder. Hey, and this is coming from a guy who owns three ladders and uses at least one of them once a month. I’ve climbed ladders, pal. Don’t think I’m a guy who has only seen ladders on TV and talks a big game. I’m a big man with big ladders. Oh look at me! I climb ladders with no shoes on! I’m a hot man! I’m not like that, okay? I climb ladders by necessity. I use ladders as tools. I don’t romanticize ladders. I don’t treat them like people. I don’t imagine a “lady ladder” where the act of climbing is sexual in nature and she blushes and moans as I ascend and descend her rungs all night long. I don’t do that. I don’t use my ladders for sexual gratification. They’re just tools. They’re not impressive. They will never impress me. They’re just ladders.