I just wanna feel for one second a moist, soft crap in my hands. Maybe hide it in my foreskin for later use. I have searched far and wide online but it is so difficult to find a woman nearby and you can’t exactly have a woman send one of her creamy, soft logs and expect it to stay that way. One man who always clouds my mind when I go into one of these depressive scat episodes is Mao Zedong. I can only imagine how nice his shits must be. The aroma, and taste, the feeling of it on my soft, delicate skin, the squeaks and squeals his behind makes when he’s letting it out, the shear pain that comes with it. It would hurt so much letting it out, but he would do it for me. I can just imagine going to work and popping a little popcorn poop to keep me going through the day when I am feeling down. Just wake up to smell the bacon and eggs we had yesterday from the bathroom, to hear the nice screams of pain. By gods, just imagine the full diapers we would keep in our collections. I just wish these women could satisfy me like he would. I honestly do not know how to go on without think of this every few seconds, it haunts me to no end. I want to seek therapy but they will never accept me and my acquired tastes.