You know before I decided I was going to make America great again I was in talks with CBS or NBC, one of those fake news stations, to make a spin off of The Apprentice but like The Bachelor. It was going to be called The John. And there’d be dozens maybe hundreds of beautiful women, mostly Russians, some that look like my daughter even. People would go nuts for that. Might have even gotten Kim Kardashian or her mom, Caitlin, to be a contestant, I don’t always discriminate against the Mexicans you know. The illegals are bad hombres, but when it comes to the women, oh wow, some of those are almost as hot as Ivanka. And milfs, well, I’ve been known to grab a milf or two by their pussies. So back to the show, believe me, you’re going to love this, they would, all these beautiful women, they all compete for a chance to be with me, dare I say it, Biblically. Me? I know, right? Who wouldn’t want that. They’d complete little tasks and I’d say, “YOU’RE FIRED!” – people love it when I say that. People just love me, I don’t know what it is. I’m just that likeable. Anyway, so then at the end, I finally pick the winner and she gets paid a million dollars to give me a beautiful golden shower, you know, to pee on me. How lucky is that? All over me until my spray tan runs and my combover is all stringy and in my eyes. We’re not going to film that part, of course, the Russians already have enough of that footage, but I think the show would have done very well. Possibly made billions.