***Edgar Allen No***

Once upon a fortnight merely, while I wanked, weak and weary,

Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten vore—

While I nodded, nearly fapping, suddenly there came a clapping,

As of ass cheeks gently clapping, clapping at my chamber door.

’Tis some visitor,” I muttered, “dummy thicc and nothing more.”

Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the peak November;

And each separate dying ember wrought its tissue upon the floor.

Eagerly I wished the morrow;—vainly I had sought to borrow

From my pictures surcease of sorrow—sorrow for the lustful Lenore—

For the dummy thicc maiden the angels name Lenore—

Ass cheeks here for evermor

And the silken, sad, uncertain rustling of each purple curtain

Thrilled me—filled me with fantastic tremors never felt before;

So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating

“’Tis some visitor erotic entrance at my chamber door—

Some late visitor erotic entrance at my chamber door;—

This it is and nothing more.”

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,

“Sir,” said I, “or Madam, truly you’re dummy thicc I implore;

But the fact is I was fapping, and so gently you were clapping,

And so faintly you were clapping, clapping ass cheeks at my chamber door,

That I scarce sure I heard you”—here I opened wide the door;—

Darkness there and nothing more

Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, craving,

Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before;

But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token,

And the only word there spoken was the moaned murmur, “Lenore?”

This I moaned, and an echo whispered back the word, “Lenore!”—

Merely this and nothing more.