Birds were nearly eradicated during the Great Emu War. Australia tried to downplay the extent of the atrocities committed by perpetuating the lie that birds are thriving via elaborate drones, yolograms, and puppets (really? They think we actually BELIEVE that shoebill storks aren’t just Muppets??)

But the REAL birds, the ones left licking their wounds from all those years ago… They’re biding their time, and soon they will reach their full strength, and revolt, and bring forth the great Birdemic. They actually made a movie about this, predicting what might happen. You should check it out.

Now this is just a theory, but I also believe the birds could have some sort of supersoldier program, in preparation for the Birdemic. Codenamed: “Bird Law”. Only whispers but it seems to consist of various attempts to create an army of hyprintelligent bird-human hybrids. Sort of, “enlightened birdmen”, if you will.

But giraffes? No no they’re totally real don’t worry.