Because it’s completely obvious who the children are, both by the arguments you’re making, and the… I’ll be kind, and call it “innocence”, rather than “stupidity”… of your arguments. Someday, you will look back on this and similar arguments, and you will facepalm at your younger self so hard that you may just be in danger of losing teeth from it. In the meantime, do yourself a favor and do not follow your own legal advice, k?