I never liked Elves. Pointed eared hippy bastards. Now Dwarves? Dwarves are real men’s men. Even the women. Especially the women. Never have I seen such a long, luxurious beard as those sported by Dwarven women. You’d think the hair would end up scruffy and curled from being down in the earth all day, but no, in fact most are meticulous in their beardcare and sport wondrous manes of silken fur.

Fucking elf pieces of shit.