I bet you’re gay. You probably have gay sex all the time. I could totally see you hypothetically having disgusting gay sex with a man right now. Wow. I can’t believe that’s something I imagine you would do. You’re disgusting.

Well, I gotta go. I don’t like talking to people who I think are gay. Based on my first impressions of you and subsequent theorizing about if and how you would have gay sex (i.e. position, top or bottom, spit or swallow, meat size, the amount of other men involved, etc.), there’s like a 63% chance you’re gay (50% is the cutoff). I’ll probably block you soon if you don’t stop making me think about you having gay sex. Alright bye 👋