I was just at this McDonald’s where these two employees were really hitting it off😳😳🥰, but the asshole manager kept splitting them apart for the tasks🙄😒.

I saw that there were only these three people there So I hatched the perfect plan😏😏 for giving them some time together without disturbance.

I gobbled them burgers down, like really pushed them down, as quickly as possible. I drank so much Coke and caffeine.And then the plan began:my constipation of three days started to clear up.

God damn it felt like a pressurised submarine in my rectum. I was about burst through my butthole, so I practically ran to the toilet and took this gigantic shit. Like the biggest and tightest shit ever. I birthed that piece of shit. damn I was grunting and crying, while this deuce practically tore up my Asshole.

Shit from the last three came out all at once. It wasn’t even like one big shit followed by few after shits. it was just one huge Monolithic artefact of feces. like an entire brick just crawled out of my asshole.

Goddamn, it was like a solid piece of gold. The minute it ended and left my asshole, I knew. I knew it wouldn’t flush. But just to be safe, I took an entire roll of toilet paper and shoved it into the toilet, the entire roll, and just to be safe threw a few pieces here and there.

then I went to town on that flush. The commode immediately started overflowing. I knew right then that I would bring together these star crossed because this is totally a two person job. and that workshy manager wouldn’t do anything.

I calmly went back to my table, orders another burger and sat there with a smug and satisfied feeling. I kept looking straight at the manager, until the water started seeping out of the toilet.

The dominoes had begun falling. There was screaming, There was crying, there was…love. The manager had no choice, but to send them both into the tight little claustrophobic love chamber to clean up the mess, but I knew they would only be making a mess🤫😉😉😏.

That manager shot horrible looks my way, because he knew my plan was foolproof. I saw the two lovers laughing hysterically, perhaps at the manager having no choice but to leave those two alone together, in there. the guy looked at me with a smile , ear to ear, as if to say “Thank you!”

All I did was nod, as if to say “you’re welcome”. But their happiness was all I wanted. Heroes don’t do it for the thanks, we do it so that love prevails. Then I grabbed my coat , walked out and vanished into the crowd. Leaving behind only prayers, hope and a room full of possibilities.