Uranium contains roughly 18 million kCal/gram. If you were to make a 1/4 lb. burger patty out of uranium, that would come to 2,041,164,000 calories for the patty alone, plus approximately 172 calories per chicken patty, giving this burger a total of 2,041,164,344 calories. This does not account for any sauces, and it may be a wise choice to forego the fries, and consider drinking a diet soda instead of regular.