here i sit, open hearted
Came to shit, but only farted
then one day, I took a chance
Tried to fart, but shit my pants
my face wrinkles in despair
as i take a glance in my pants
and smelt the unfresh air
I look around in horror and fear
down my face falls a single tear
the egg i ate earlier that day digested
made my behind not California regulated
I cried and cried from this single error
as it made my ass look like an act of terror
*“why did you do this to me“ i replied to god,
hoping on act of mercy
but the authorities already there for a greater good
bringing that rectum back, as its act of cruelty
I heard the sirens as they wailed and wailed
I screamed “IT WON’T WORK” for my ass had failed
The smell of sulfur filled the air,
Everyone turned their face with shock and despair
this mortal life, it is not fair
I screamed at God, “DO YOU NOT CARE?!”
Here I sit, cheeks a-flexin. Trying to make another Texan
My reputation wailed, I tried to bail
But my stupid fucking ass had already failed
Off my chances they had sailed
Now my ass is getting railed
– the story end of a man with not california regulated alfter
as he began to faint