Now before today I didn’t consider myself especially smart or talented, but what sets me apart is that I’m a Redditor. I enjoy spending my days scrolling through the intellectual goldmine that is Reddit. Now, yesterday was just a normal day, I had just got done destroying a libtard on r/politics and I was scrolling through my feed when suddenly, I happened upon this curious subreddit, OkBuddyRetard. Now don’t let that name fool you, it was truly the furthest thing from “retarded”. What lie past the gates of OKBR was a sanctuary of pure genius. This display of intellect was up there with the great philosophers of the 1800s. Not even Albert Einstein himself could’ve comprehended the anomaly’s I saw. Needless to say, I was hooked on this crazy intellectual drug trip. But after 6 hours of scrolling, I felt my brain shut off as I fell to the floor in pure ecstasy. It was too much. I felt the very anatomy of my brain changing, I would never be the same. I dreamt of mathematical breakthroughs, studies of quarks and the very fabric of reality itself, with this newfound power bestowed upon me by the intellectuals of OKBR. The next day, I did not wake up in my room. As I stood up from my daze, I looked around and saw professors and philosophers. One asked, “Sir, tell us the secret to how you solved String Theory”. They lead me to a podium, I was to speak of my accomplishments to all the greatest minds, Professors and geniuses of the world. With this newfound power, I was unstoppable. There was only one thing I had to say to them, “OkBuddyRetard”.