I think I have an addiction to Reddit. The other day I saw a man help another man across the street and I wanted to upvote it. Later that day, a lady was yelling at a man on the subway and I had the urge to downvote it, but I quickly realized there was no downvote button. The following week a dog was running down the highway and I wanted to share what I saw to everyone I’m friends with but there was no share button. I was in class and a guest speaker came in and gave a riveting speech, so much so that the first thought that came to my mind was to award this speaker with a platinum medal. I was gonna tell my friends a story that was a bit edgy, but there was no way of marking my story “NSFW” so I just didn’t tell it because I didn’t want to upset anyone if their ears weren’t ready for the filthy story I was about to tell. I’m going to see a specialist next week regarding my crippling addiction to reddit. Every action in my life revolves around getting karma and I can’t stop thinking about amassing a collection of internet points that I hope in the future will be worth some form of currency.