I (14M) can’t stop masturbating to Dream’s (23M) face reveal. I have busted 621 nuts to him in the past 72 hours. He has the absolute cutest face I have ever seen. It’s so dreamy! I imagine his Walter Jr face calling me a pussy as I fuck his bussy, and it makes my head burst every time.

I was edging from the moment Minecraft Steve announced his face reveal. The instant his Matpat-Shane Dawson love child face sang “Hi!” at 1:17 in the video, my pants pistol unleashed a cumshot heard ‘round the world. My sexcaliber has been firing ever since.

I want to fly down to his house at [redacted] and bust 621 more nuts in his troll face as he speed-sucks my diamond pickaxe. Then I will mine his asshole until I fill his cave with my love lava. I want to FUCK Dream so FUCKING MUCH! oooOOOOO HERE I CUM AGAIN!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWUUUUUUUUUGGGH FUCK YES CLAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY

So anyway, humans of Reddit. Am I the asshole for constantly masturbating to Matpat Walter Jr Trollface Lord Farquaad Minecraft Steve Rumpelsiltskin Tony Ridinger Jerma’s ¾ of a face?