Authors Note;

I am writing this novel because I am a fan of Sesame Street. However its become clear to me that the creators of it have got some things wrong and clearly don’t care about making it good. I am talking mostly of “the problem” with Big Bird and Ernie.Also a lot of the sex is censored with many of the intercourse’s that happened edited out completely.(ie, Big Bird and Bert having interior decorating, that time with Ernie doing it with Zoe and Abby watching, etc.)
This fic is my attempt to correct that.
By supporting this fic I hope to get a group of elite Sesame Street writers working with this new canon and to establish this as the truth of what actually happened. Hopefully the original creators will see the demand and make this official. Perhaps even pay us because we are fixing their mistakes.
If you wish to join my new canon, feel free to write your own story but you must submit it to me for approval. You can use my email ;
theRealSesame [email protected]
You can also send constructive reviews there, but no petty criticisms. If I get motivations muddled,its because my cat distracted me.
Also, if you don’t like my story you don’t have to have read it.

Anyway, and now on with the real story of how things actually happened;
We now turn out headlights to full beam in order to gaze forward though the mists of time.
The light from them reflects off, not a deer, but a scene 10 years from now – 1 decade into the future.

Big Bird enters the scene, but whats this? Cookie Monster is there too.

“Do you remember that thing that happened 10 years ago? The one that seemed like it would split us apart forever, but instead brought us closer then ever? That brought us……to each-other?”

“The time with the The Letter E?”
“Yes!”
“Oh, yes right”

“Its hard to believe what happened isn’t it? What happened and what it led to”
“Yes my sweetness” said Cookie Monster, giving Big Bird a “special” kiss.
“Now that I have remembered it again I will never forget it.”
“It was pretty life changing.”

So we now dim our headlights and reverse drive back to the presence, the mists closing back around the future and the camera of our mind drawing back to the world we know of as the now.
This is the story of one loan heroes struggle to overcome to the forces of evil. This hotness’s name: Big Bird!!!”

—
Meanwhile, back in the future, Big Bird and Cookie Monster were enjoying each-other.
As the narrator, I will respect their privacy and not specify how- lets just say it involved peckers. Its certainly clear they were close.
Not just metaphorically but physically with their bodies as well.

Cookie Monster was distracted though, thinking back to the past. We join him on his mid-hot yoga flashback, a flashback to our story in the present……
—
Big Bird was sitting in 123 Sesame Street one day, with Abby.
They were doing their favorite pass-time:jacking off.

As they did this together The Yellow One gazed deep into her eyes. “Oh,Abby , I have something very important to tell u.”
“Yes, splenda-filled honeybunches of oats ?” she said, batting her eyes.
Big Bird said, ”I hate you now!”
Then he took her arm and tore it off.Blood covered everything and there was screaming. Big Bird took her arm and started hitting her with it.
She exploded because she was a demon, but she was okay.
Big Bird walked away. “Cool guys don’t look at explosions.”
Abby Cadabby giggled.

The next day…
—
And now, with that, we once again turn our headbrains to the future, stepping forward down the road of time and walking for 10 years until we get to the place in time which this takes place.

Big Bird and Cookie Monster were just finishing. Out of respect for their privacy I will not specify what they were just finishing.

“arg…that was good sex” said Cookie Monster.
“yes, yes it was” said Big Bird.
“You seemed a little distracted near the end though. Not your normal energetic self”
“yes…sorry about that. I was thinking back to a decade ago, when I first realized my feelings for you even though I didn’t know it at the time.
Its what opened my eyes to what I felt all along. The missing jigsaw piece to my heart in which you were the key to unlock”

“And our love grew together from that moment to blossom into the great tree that it is today”

“I love you The Yellow One my irresistibleness”.
“I love you too Cookie Monster -my better half.

And they smiled the smile of lovers at each-other, as we fade out into the sunset.
Big Bird and his team went carefully through 123 Sesame Street. Big Bird looked very sexy, His nipples perked, firm and erect. His leather coat bilbogged in the breeze, extrapolating His sex mess. “It is time”, He said, His voice having a British nationality.
“Yes, It is time to defeat Bert once and for all.” said Ernie . He wore a Black corset covered in Cocks and a nice hat. His nails were iridescent black and he had a ruby skull ring on.He looked as hot as a Chilli!

And then they rushed into the base. Zoe roundhouse kicked a mook and then punched one with her glock. It exploded and she held up her middle finger to the explosion.Zoe then used her holy holy magics and summoned a giant bloody cross scythe that glowed black. She sliced everyone but it was okay because she dodged her friend. Blood spurted and went on everything, making a star of david one the walls. A eye bulb bounced off Bert as he entered, LOOKING FUCKING PISSSSED.
“How dared you! I will kill u!!!!!!111!!!” he shoouted and took out a flame thrower (A/N geddit?)
The fight was epic. Things burned black. Andromielle and Big Bird got distracted and started kissing in the corner and doing Dunking the cosmic donut but then one died.
Big Bird Ejaculated at the Bert, “LOOK BEHIND YOU!”
And then he looked and Big Bird ripped him in half.

The End