Dear dearest brother, I write to you from the gold mines of California as I search for gold. Times are rough I haven’t seen a woman in my 10 years toiling down here. The last few pictures you sent me of the family gave me hope. The smiling faces of you, Papa John, Uncle Clit, Mama GiantDickMaster1832, Sister Annaliese, and last but not least Cornwall the Dog gave me an inkling of hope.

However do me this favor in your next picture. Please have everyone be visibly barefoot. Especially Cornwall, who has a nasty habit of wearing moccasins in these photos and obscuring the toes.