You can’t fuck a Gardevoir. I don’t care if it has sexy long legs and downright marvelous sparkly anime eyes, it’s a fucking Pokemon. It’s part of the amorphous egg group so do you wanna know what that means buddy pal? That means fucking it would be like putting your dick in some formless and malleable and squishy—I don’t even wanna think how that feels, that’s probably somebody’s fetish but it’s fucked up! Also the only holes it probably has are it’s eyes and the black holes it can make. You know I started a Mega Evolution and it’s downright amazing to watch my good friend Mega Evolve a Gardevoir but now every time I see her do that I remember the shitty fucking PORN I see when I just wanna look at these gorgeous creatures and it makes me die inside! I don’t care about some “Will serve and protect its trainer and care for him” buggery bull-crap, it can serve you and love you in ways that don’t involve trying to fuck it! Hug and cuddle your Gardevoir, don’t try and fuck it you sick freak, Jesus fucking Christ, fuck a human! I do it all the time! Go by a bar or a cafe if I feel classy, pick up someone and then I fuck em! It’s really not that hard!