WARNING: Carry on reading this and you will die, even if you read the warning lol. Donkey Kong was a brilliant man, until he went through the process of becoming a Kong like Donkey Kong. It began with a simple ejaculation process into the exact coordinates of (-3, 15) of a body pillow which housed a picture of a nude triangle with four corners. In this process, Donkey Kong began to grow fur in his genital area which spread to the rest of his body, looking like a overgrown monkey. He shaped into a quadrilateral pentagon, a xenomorph with yellow fever, and then into the shape of the Donkey Kong we know and love today. Donkey Kong will now break your window at 5:00 AM and yell “NOT FUNNY, DIDN’T LAUGH.” Then he will continue to pound you into beaten meat until you drown on your own blood. If you repost this to 200 discord servers and 100 subreddits, Donkey Kong will not pound you in your sleep.