Started when he came out of the womb, at 2 years his mother first recorded his condition. His favourite flavour is Paki. He has eaten it for breakfast. His Dad is involved. He contributes to the act. He has challenged Aden for 5 dollars to watch the video. When asked if he’s tried anal, he said he has given anal, while the receiving person shitted it was a battle, Ahmed’s dick vs shit. His favourite toppings are tomato, mushrooms, pumpkin spice, and ravioli. His gender is transsexual. When asked if he’s willing to stop, he simply smiled and said “Only if NASA does it”. His greatest shit was with Mr. Upperwood, Mr. Lithick, and Mrs. Hydeson when they all shit into a bowl, add some strawberry flakes, chopped up cucumbers, shredded carrots, sprinkle of pumpkin spice, whipped cream on the tip, and top it off with avacodo spice and Müller. His original husband was his sister, but has had an affair with Mr. Nadge P. Fucker, which includes all of our parents. They like to poop on the desk, grab it, cup it in both hands, and high five in slow motion, and then a jerk circle. When asked to stop, he explains that he finds it satisfying and healthy. His idea is that it’s neutral; Eat shit, poop shit. He has been caught once, by his dad. He challenged his dad to what can only be described as a negative tug-of-war, but he had diarrhoea. His worst experience was when he did not eat a lot, and had to go to his daily with Mr. Nadge. Mr. Nadge had a lot of girls with him. Mr. Nadge asked Ahmed to shit a mighty load to attract the girls, but when he tried he could not shit the mighty Titanic, but only reindeer drops. The girls laughed at him and Mr. Upperwood came, and shat in his penis hole. Ahmed wanted to liquefy it by closing the tip, and mushing it around. He then climaxed, and splurt it in the air. The term “Holy shit” was originally coined by Ahmed. How? Mushroom sauce and ravioli, and had the biggest shit. It was THICCC, with 3 Cs. Each one had a triple bond, even though that’s not possible, since Carbon only has 4 valence electrons. Ahmed managed to squeeze out 6. At a conference, he needed to shit. This was 19th B.C., which stands for Before Shit Chris. The washrooms were the kind of washrooms where you had to squat. His shit was THICC, with infinite Cs. He was trying to push, but only farts came out. Those farts created craters, deep in the ground, further and further, until finally he channeled all his energy into the shit, and dropped a health 23.6 foot log, which took 2 hours to squeeze all out. It was both painful and pleasurable. It was sharp and THICC. Whilst trying his face turned purple and he almost passed out. All this time he was being videotaped, then it was posted onto YouTube titled “Longest Snake”. He has also made a porno. It was the 2 Girls 1 Cup. He was the tranny. When his asshole gets itchy he lets out a nice, sharp fart, and cut it clean. Finally, his most memorable shit was when he was on a tall building. He needed to let out a shit from the 7th dimension. Whilst on the toilet instead of squeezing it out, he held it all together and released it as one nuclear bomb. His shit was so powerful it measured 69.69 horsepower from his 6 cylinder anus. It measured 9.78 on the Richter scale. His shit blasted through the toilet, and right through the entire building, causing it to collapse, and that was known as, “The Inside Job”.

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