Your kink is boring. There. I said it.

BDSM. Leather. Role playing. Boring. As. Fuck. It takes no talent to hit me, and you usually don’t look as good in those clothes as you think you do. My feet are small and darling but being obsessed with them is creepy. And boring.

If a man were to talk about how frequently he fantasized about punching and choking women outside of a sexual context, most people would rightfully acknowledge him as a creepy, abusive dickhead. If that same person says he wants to do that in bed to get off, suddenly it’s woke? Why is violence suddenly a good thing when it’s sexual?

most of the “kinky” people I personally know are girl in their early twenties, and almost all of them have serious mental health issues and/or trauma. they’re all “submissives” too, while the (admittedly few) kinky guys I know are dominants. most of the people I currently know who call themselves kinky have not yet had sex, or only had pretty bad sex.

it’s truly shocking how normalised kink culture is with minors. no one sees anything wrong with this, and sometimes it makes me feel like i’m the crazy one.

Gaslighting me that loving, ordinary sex is “vanilla” ain’t going to work. It overwhelms the senses when done properly, and takes more technique than fetish gear. I remember an old Monty Python book from the 70s that had a chapter spoofing *The Joy Of Sex,* where Eric Idle (?) and a model posed in hilarious positions that didn’t involve any sex at all. That’s how kink generally feels to me. I suspect it’s a way to mask your refusal to learn to really please your partner. Y’all need more of this:

> Headmaster: So just listen… now did I or did I not do vaginal juices?
>
> Pupils: Yes sir.
>
>Headmaster: Name two ways of getting them flowing, Watson.
>
>Watson: Rubbing the clitoris, sir.
>
>Headmaster: What’s wrong with a kiss, boy? Hm? Why not start her off with a nice kiss? You don’t have to go leaping straight for the clitoris like a bull at a gate. Give her a kiss, boy.
>
>Wymer: Suck the nipple, sir.
>
>Headmaster: Good. Good. Good, well done, Wymer.
>
>Duckworth: Stroking the thighs, sir.
>
>Headmaster: Yes, I suppose so.
>
>Another: Bite the neck.
>
>Headmaster: Good. Nibbling the ear. Kneading the buttocks, and so on and so forth. So we have all these possibilities before we stampede towards the clitoris, Watson.
>
>Watson: Yes sir. Sorry sir.