God, what the hell is wrong with my life. I’m sitting here, past midnight, alone in my room, anime open on one tab and Jake’s stream on the other, just hoping for some sweet honey babes to show up so I can start squeezin. Instead I’m staring at two UCLA guys. Where’s Chloe? What happened to Rene? What is wrong with me? I could google some sweet porn at any time, but instead I’m waiting to yank it to twitch. I gotta get up at 5am tomorrow too. My parents were right – I AM a failure.