One time I shattered my ankle while on a jog, which in general is not a fun activity. I would not recommend it, despite popular belief. Since American healthcare is a dystopian hellscape I called an uber. People were saying “call an ambulance, look at your ankle! Oh my God!” to which I said “you gonna pay for that shit?” and they looked miffed, but you are basically being the “call 911!” guy, only you are suggesting I pay thousands of dollars. A small Latino child from nowhere approached me and offered me a blue gatorade. What an absolute fucking CHAD. Not only did he give me a gatorade in my time of need, but it was ‘Cool Blue’ ICE COLD. This kid fucking ruled.

An A tier gatorade flavor, easily. I don’t drink sugary drinks anymore, pretty much just water, coffee, tea, and the occasional tequila or whisky. I felt I deserved to treat myself to those 36 ounces of sugar as my ankle was nearly facing backwards and the Adrenalin was wearing off. I gave this kid five bucks, he tried to refuse but he was easily the most helpful person and deserved it. He said some shit to me in spanish, and I had no fucking idea bro. So I just said “bueno!” and he looked confused. He pointed at the sky and looked frantic. I just said “ankle fuego, importa, gatorade bueno, denada.” He smiled and nodded, so I felt I broke cultural boundaries and probably solved racism that day. I digress.

A lovely man named Adarsh picked me up in his Uber. He was pleasantly surprised to see someone limping to his car and covered in blood. Let me tell ya. At this point the shock was completely gone. Just waves of sharp piercing agony. Adarsh turned down the radio, and I told him not to silence his jams on my behalf. He asked “are you sure?” which solidified my boy was jammin’ and it wasn’t just white noise. So we listen to Bon Jovi the entire ride to the emergency, which was pretty fucking sweet. Although I wanted to tell this agonizing pain pulsating through my leg to fucking Bon Jov Blow me, ya feel me? Of course you do. This comment is topical. Bon Jovi is eternal.

Adarsh helps carry me over his shoulder like a supporting character does the protagonist in a shonen series after a hard battle. I check in to the emergency. I proceed to sit in the waiting room for an entire hour watching Maury. It was one of those “weird phobia” episodes and they literally chased a woman through their studio with a jar of pickles lmao. What the fuck is this solving Maury? Come on bro. You sadistic sweater wearing fuck. After seeing person after person go in, and the fact that I am straight up gritting my teeth like Guts fighting an Apostle because I am in so much pain. I hop over to the front desk and say “I really need to see the doctor or please give me morphine,” they tell me to sit down not even looking at me. I am a very calm person, it takes a lot to fluster me. After almost three hours of tanking a shattered ankle I was pissed, and this almost never happens.

I told him “when you were young you decided to enter the medical field to help people, I assume. You had an ambition to reduce harm, and make people feel looked after. You are failing to the person you once were.” Yeah, it is dramatic, but like, I was barely even able to see straight give me a break.

This guy flips around with a pissed off look and NOW sees my ankle fully. His anger dissipates and they get me a wheelchair and back there in like two minutes. The X-Ray tech comes out and gives me the lead vest to place over my ankle. He lays me out on the padded platform and gives me the vest. I told him “man, I know this is a douchey thing to say but this vest only covers my leg, may I get another?” and he says “no, you will be fine.” He turns on the machine. I say “In all due respect you are all the way over there already,” and he sighs saying “Get asked that all the time. I have to do this due to repeated exposures.” I shake my head and say “no there are more vests behind you, I want to cover my balls,” and he laughs his ass off. Grabs me another vest specifically for my royal jewels.

Turns out So to add on to your point, if you ask for an additional vest they may reject you but if you say it is for your balls they may oblige.