My relationship to copypasta writing is a tumultuous one. I don’t even know where to begin, let alone how to officially start. For me, I don’t utilize rough drafts and my thoughts come out in a disorganized fashion. It’s difficult to find coherency with my inner dialogue when I’m working on articulating what I need—or more importantly, want— to say. I am lead to believe that my writing style is an idiosyncratic one—one that does not bode well in a formal context or assignment; whatever that is—or most realizing, the one I’m relegated to demonstrating here. There are challenges because I never quite learnt the ‘proper’ way to go about deciphering texts and investigate into the depths of the literal English language. There are many things that I need to work on; however, I am also blind sighted because I don’t know where to point and seek advice on. Perhaps my stream of consciousness as I present here will foretell those who possess more mastery of such discipline who can not only identify, but guide, lead, and enlighten me in my aware but limited ways.
With such disclaimer said, the most challenging part of all-things copypasta writing and reading related can be the organized, logical, coherent fashion that language is structured. As a contrasting example, I had a short-lived stint in taking a foreign language in college preparatory school—Latin—where I vividly remember that the word order differed entirely from English. It offered more flexibility. Contrary to this, English from my understanding requires meticulous syntax; subject must come first, before the verb, then the object. Both languages, nonetheless, require exquisite detail and adherence to their respective grammar and proper conjugation. However, what bothered me the most is that English as a whole, is the stringent necessity of having strict syntax; it is very rule-oriented and for someone that is naturally disorganized; rules and organization for writing puts added pressure onto me as a writer. Sometimes I ask, “Am I following the rules? “
Another challenge to writing/reading of the copypasta is the necessity to quickly identify the thesis –the point—of whatever text is assigned to me. I am a person of wanderlust, yet only that lust is not travel but in my imagination. Focus is something that I woefully lack in academic reading. I have many more questions that arise, and in turn, obfuscate my understanding of the topic at hand. I begin to deviate my focus from the subject/assignment and delve into variant topics. I am a thinker of limited capacity to response thoughtfully to what I’m reading. To reference Anne Lamott’s The Crummy First Draft is a pain and nuisance, if I let alone remember to do so. I often time feel I must deliberately pick superficial passages to find a sentence or two as “examples” to “support my statement.” Perhaps as Ms. Lamott says, “Almost all good writing begins with terrible first efforts.” proves that my ‘first effort’ here is just that—terrible.
I suppose I don’t have any direct knowhow of explaining things coherently, in an organized fashion, so perhaps my style has in attempts to pursue this writing Sample for Niteo Writing Seminar of the Fall 2015 semester resulted in satire about my inadequacies in commanding the English language. I hope to determine if my writing here can salvaged, let alone learn if it’s worth being salvaged. Perhaps my efforts can be revitalized and reinvigorated into something more tangible and practical that is acceptable for the academe. Perhaps I’ll be able to do this by the end of the class, or at least provide as a foundation and steppingstone to some pathway towards there. Perhaps not. What I do know is that I have a long ways to go in my writing from the point of leaving “prep school” and my copypasta writing/reading today.