S’goin’ on man,

 Dang ol’, name’s Boomhauer n’ tellyawhat, hate erry single oneayou, knowudimsayin? All ya’ll fat, dang ol’, dumbusdoorknobsyankees, talkinabout, spend errydamnsecondoftheday checkin out du du dumb pictures. Talkinabout, damnwaste atime, yaskme, knowimsayin’?. For realman, anyo’ya’ll even, talkinabout, goin out to the club, getwhatimean, get somudatyaknow, WHOO WHOO, knowimsayinman? Talkinabout, y’know it IS purdyfun gettinon dang ol’ computer, and just click-click-click-click-click, thateasyman, gettinon the dang ol’ websites and just lookinatda dang ol’ picshas and bein’ like hehelookadis, man, knowimsayin, but tellyahwut, ya’ll takinittoofar man, tellinya, too far.

 Don’t be, talkinbout, beatinaroun a bush, juslike, bestraightuptalkinabouttellitlikeitis. Dangol’, juslookatme,man. Gotnoproblemso’erhere,man, tellyouhwut. Gotmeset o’ weights, knowimsayin, jusgetonthatb-b-benchpress, knowimsayin, juslike twohunderdthreehundered pounds, justbelike SOOPSOOPSOOP, dangol, like40repsaintnothin, turnarounddangol, getouttomyridesallyman, revituplike VROOMVROOMVROOM, dangol, built hermuhself, knowimsayinman? Watyou uptoman, dangolgettinonthecomputer, justlike, typetytype, talkinbout, nakedcartoonsman. Tellyuhwutman, dangol, gotme3rdgirlthisweek, tookherhome, knowimsayinman. (Talkinabout, gettindownandirtywiththatmouthaction, knowimtalkinboutman? Justlikedangol, talkinbout, just like.. damn). Dangol, shouldbeashamed ayourselves. Tellyouhwutman, justtellinitlikeitis.

 Dang’oltellinyahwut, clickclickchoosefilesearchpicture, itsme an’myrideman, knowimsayin?