[Would you consider jacking off to be a sport?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7kiSm4cMEUU)

I don’t know about you mothafuckas, but I consider that shit to be a sport, okay?

If people can sit back and label godamn golf–which is the boring-est fuckin ‘sport’ in the world– a godamn sport, if you can label that shit as a sport and if you can label godamn fishing as a sport,

I know damn well you can label jacking off as a sport.

Think about it, what the fuck are you doing athletically in golf, my nigga? all you doing hittin the godamn golf club <clicks tongue>

“oh my god man, that’s a longass birdie man, nice birdie man, nice birdie, nice putt, it went 250–“

get the fuck outta here, nobody cares about that boring ass shit. Who the fuck really watch golf, my nigga? <snores>

nobody gives a fuck, it makes niggas fall asleep

fishing on the other hand— what the FUCK are you REALLY doing athletically, my nigga, in fishing!?

All you doin is you sitting that bitchass up in a boat– usually it’s oldass snag-a-teeth motherfuckas that ain’t got no godamn teeth bein a fuckin grill with a bandaid mouth. They just sittin’ in a boat– you know what i’m sayin?– throwing a godamn rod, it could be any kindof godamn bait on the end of the rod– it could be a worm, it could be a caterpillar, it could be a centipede, it could be a deadass butterfly, it can be the fuckin beak of a damn bird, it could be a fuckin— it could be anything, you know what i’m sayin?

“OH MY GOD WE CAUGHT A BIGASS SALMON! REEL THAT FAT BITCH IN, YEAH!”

What the fuck…!? what are you doin athletically? How the fuck is that workin up a sweat, my nigga? What, you’re workin up your arms cos you have to reel that mothafucka in? Look, that’s not a sport dawg– well, fuck it! it is a sport. Fuck it. You guys wanna consider that shit a sport?

Jacking off is a fuckin sport to me. Jacking off and beating your motherfuckin dick to porn is a sport. There’s two damn things that you have to do:

A) you build up a sweat– well, actually, you don’t have to do shit–

There’s basically two things that go down, that’s what i meant to say,

A) you’re building up a sweat

I don’t give a fuck nigga, If you are building up a sweat–godammt– that shit’s considered a sport. You’re building up a sweat.

Number two) in the most— in the most important part of that shit is that… <clicks tongue> <deep sigh> is that your hand is getting a workout. Your hand is getting a workout nigga, you’re building up your arm strength and you’re building up your hand strength okay.

Um, i don’t know bout’chu nigga, but when i’m beatin my shit nigga, when my hand muscles get fuckin tight, you know what i’m sayin– and that shit- and that shit wears the fuck out of my entire left arm.

I used to be able to do it with my right hand- can’t do that shit- so i do it with my left hand.

Um, so, in my personal opinion, do you guys consider jacking off a sport?

in my- nigga- in my opinion, i believe it is. so, uh, i know what some of you little trollin’ ass faggot bitches are gonna say “Oh man! you must not get some of that pussy mothafucka if you jack off–!”

motherfucka, let’s be real, okay? everybody has jacked off once in their godamn life.

if you wanna sit back and you’re gonna come on my video and troll my shit sayin that “oh nigga, um, um– i never jacked off once in my life”

bitch, stop lyin, everybody does this shit, okay? so please miss me with that bullshit nigga and ghost nigga and go, go preach that shit to somebody who fuckin, is actually gonna listen to you, okay?

number two– “oh my god, this video- it was stupid, it was pointless–“

Couldn’t have been that stupid, bitch? you still clicked on it- you know what i’m sayin?

all the mothafuckas that’s watchin this video-nigga, you saw the title of the fucking video BEFORE you CLICKED on the video. So i couldn’t have been that damn stupid if you still proceeded to CLICK on the motherfucker.

So.

Jacking off.

The shit’s a sport.

Fuck it.