This post makes me miss the pranks I did back in the day – ranging from putting ketchup packets under the toilet seat to planting fake dog shit in the most absurd places, but my dad would beat my ass for pulling them. However I decided to take my pranking a step further.

My mother is deaf and blind. For as long as I could remember, I’ve had to take care of her dumbass. I soon got tired of her bossing me around all the goddamn time and wanted to take matters into my own hands.

One day, my mother and I were sitting on the couch. I was watching TV and she was “reading” some stupid ass book in braille about essential oils or some retarded shit like that. It was a Saturday, and my homies were working at the time and my father was at work so I had nothing better to do except stay home and take care of her. This is where it gets good.

My mother was sucking on a lollipop while she was reading. However, it really didn’t upset me or annoy the fuck out of me. Watching the way her lips worked it and the way her tongue swirled around the lollipop was rather arousing.

Somehow, she drops it on the floor. She frantically stops reading and starts freaking out.

“Billy! Please find my lollipop I need it! Please!”

Mmmmmm. Game time, bitch.

I get up and unzip my pants, pulling out my raging hard tallywacker. I slowly walk over, britches around my ankles and grab her wrist and guide her over to grip my shaft.

As soon as she makes contact with my iron-hard cock, her mouth was wide open. I immediately grabbed her by her nasty, nappy-ass hair and slammed my throbbing cock down the back of her throat.

“Here’s your lollipop back, you stupid bitch!” I scream.

She starts gagging for air. She tries slapping me and pushing me off, but luckily she was too weak to really fight back from sitting on her ass all day. Soon geysers of vomit starts gushing out of her mouth. This only pushed me over the edge.

I pulled my soggy cock out of her mouth to give her a breather. She starts violently coughing.

“Haha, just kidding!” and I quickly thrust my throbbing cock right back into her throat, followed my shooting my rocketing teen-gravy deep into her stomach. Suddenly my dad walks in. We make eye contact.

Fuck.

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!?” He screams. He quickly takes off his belt and chases after me.

“It’s just a prank bro!” I scream.

My pants still around my ankles, I jumped out the nearest window, breaking the glass and cutting up my cock and balls in the process. I still wasn’t able to get away and I got the ass beating of my life.

I got put up for adoption that day.