if i was a nigger…i could drive a cadillac with class
my pocket stuffed with welfare checks, and i could sit
on my big black ass
now you take a nigger, he aint nobody’s fool, he
doesn’t buy any gasoline to drive his kids to school
damn i wish i was a nigger
our government has gone crazy, id change things if i
could
if i was only a nigger, i could afford to live in a
white neighborhood
oh the things that i could do, if i was black and hell
bent
i could send my kids to college, and it wouldn’t cost
me one damn cent
damn i wish i was a nigger
the wife and i were down on our luck, we were really
getting uptight
they said at the welfare office, you aint black you’re
white
oh how I’ve tried to get a job, a diploma i had with
pride
the post office man laughed and said youre not dark
enough to even qualify
damn i wish i was a nigger
i took a civil service exam, and passed it without
shame
a nigger took one next to me, and he couldnt even write
his own name
the nigger, he got the job, now he’s government top ?
prass?
he couldn’t qualify for a trash truck, I’m out on the
street on my ass
damn i wish i was a nigger
I know that I’m just white trash
And I like to f**k my own sister in the ass
That my papa raped my mom so I could be
And my whole family never made it passed grade 3
But damn I wish I was a nigger
if i was a Jesse Jackson, id be nobody’s slob
wearin $500.00 dollar suits, that nigger hasn’t even
got a job
if i was Jackson Brown, i could sit back and relax
and if elected president, could paint the white house
black
damn i wish i was a nigger
if i was a jig-a-boo, i could find me my roots
with a afro big as a watermelon, and a pair of white
disco boots
if i was only dark complexioned, i could stand tall in
this life
i could eat high off the hog, just me and my white wife
damn i wish i was a nigger
things are supposed to be segregated, but things are a
little off key
I’ve never seen a white man, head…of the NAACP
it aint that i don’t like a nigger, if I’ve rubbed you
wrong by chance
take a look at that mistletoe, hanging on the seat of
my pants
damn i wish i was a nigger
if i was a kinky top, i could be a Martin Luther King
id have me a vision on a mountain top, my song the
whole world would sing
i could have me a peace march, on the streets of
Memphis, Tennessee
i could tare up the whole damn city, and the police
wouldn’t dare stop me
damn i wish i was a nigger
a lot of things in life i know, but one thing i cant
figure
why a nigger can call me a honkey, and i cant call a
nigger a nigger
if i was a jungle bunny, i could ring a golden bell
i could be a Mohammed Ali, and be loved by Howard
Cosell
damn i wish i was a nigger
if i was a you-bangy, 7 foot tall and lean
i could be a famous player, on the Washington
basketball team
if i was only chocolate brown, i could have me some
turnip greens
a possum fat, and watermelon, chitlins, and a pot of
butter beans
damn i wish i was a nigger
now when Martin Luther King, was buried in Washington
with class
face down in his box, so the politicians could kiss his
ass
i guess its just politics, and it sure gets my goat
kiss assin’ with a nigger, just to get his vote
damn i wish i was a nigger
if i was only a burrhead, id live high on the hill
sellin’ cocaine and prostitutes, and poppin’ all kinds
of
pills
now take the NAACP, they can march and raise all kinds
of hell
let the KKK start to move, and they’ll all wind up in
jail
damn i wish i was a nigger
i dreamed my life was over, i heard saint peter say
today we’re taken on the niggers, you’ve gotta go
the..other way
then i heard the devil, he said i heard what peter had
to say
but I’m sorry to tell you son, today in hell…is
nigger day
damn don’t you wish you were a nigger
I’m going back to the hills of Arkansas, where they
don’t have those not damn one sided nigger peace
marches
protesters, welfare check grabbers, I’m gon’ plant me
some turnip greens in a watermelon patch
raise me a hog, and a big fat possum
i said yes i am you mother