Thousands and thousands of years ago, there existed a country called Seville. In this country, there were 2 largely practiced religions: Simonism and Theodorism. These religious communities coexisted peacefully, for they were very similar. They both worshiped 2 Goddesses: Jeanette and Eleanor. Long ago, before creation, these Goddesses chose spouses, Jeanette took Simon, and Eleanor took Theodore. As celebration, each couple engaged in oral sex. As for which God received the most pleasurable experience, is unbeknownst to anyone. This is where the Great Dispute comes in. Many people believed that Theodore’s experience was the most pleasurable. These people became known as the Theodorians. On the contrary, many believed that it was Simon with the best experience. These people became the Simonists. The country of Seville prospered for centuries, until the Alvinists invaded. The Alvinists claimed that there was a third Goddess named Brittany. Brittany supposedly took Alvin as her spouse, and they joined the others in celebration. And the people that believe in the third Goddess also believe that Alvin had the most pleasurable experience. The day that the Alvinists invaded was a tragic one. They came in aggressively, ready for warfare. Initially, the Theodorians and Simonists allied against the Alvinists, and eliminated a large portion of their army. Subsequently, one of the Alvinists yelled out “The Simonists are killing the Theodorians!” This ploy worked, and the Theodorians started attacking the Simonists. The Alvinists used this opportunity to gang up on the Simonists. After most of the Simonists were wiped out, the Theodorians issued a peace treaty with the Alvinists. Today, many people believe that the Alvinists won the war, which is not entirely false, but they don’t know that the Theodorians continued to prosper and had the highest oral sex rate for centuries to come, while the Alvinist community gradually diminished into nothing. Still some people know deep down that the Simonists were never wiped out and replaced the Theodorians. So it is up to you, dear reader, who’s getting the best head?