Last weekend I saw someone beat the living shit out of their wife at Applebees and it was brutal! I was trying to order off the 2 for $20 menu when suddenly I hear THUD THUD THUD and see this large white guy with a Scooby-Doo tattoo smashing his wife’s bimbo face onto the table THUD THUD THUD there was blood everywhere and the muffled screams were a little annoying. Like dude, I was just drinking my skim milk and I see this fat broad getting face fucked by the corner of the table. I asked the waitress for a new seat because the sound of the screaming and crying was distracting me from my delicious Applebees fries, they were lightly salted and really great! I fucking love Applebee’s dude.