She sells seashells on the seashore, but the value of these shells will fall due to the laws of supply and demand. No one wants to buy shells when there’s loads on the sand.

Step 1: Must create a sense of scarcity. Shells will sell much better if the people think they’re rare, you see. Bear with me, take as many shells as you can find and hide em on an island. Stockpile em high until they’re rarer than a diamond.

Step 2: Gott a make the people think they want em. Really want em. Really fuckin want em. Gotta hit em like Bronson. Influencers, product placement, featured primetime entertainment. If you haven’t got a shell then you’re just a fuckin waste man.

Step 3: It’s monopoly. Invest inside some property. Start a corporation, make a logo, do it properly. “These shells must sell,” that will be your new philosophy. Swallow all your morals, they’re a poor man’s quality.

4: Expand, expand, expand! Clear forests. Make land. Fresh blood on hands.

5: Why just shells? Why limit yourself? She sells seashells, sell oil as well!

6: Guns, sell stocks, sell diamonds, sell rocks! Sell water to a fish, sell time to a clock!

7: Press on the gas! Take your foot off the brakes! Then run to be the president of the United States!

8: Big smile mate, big wave! That’s great! Now the truth is overrated tell lies out the gate!

9: Polarize the people, controversy is the game! It don’t matter if they hate you if they all say your name!

10: The world is yours. Step out on the stage to a round of applause. Your a liar, a cheat, a devil, a whore, and you sell seashells on the seashore.