I have phantom pains in my giant shlong. See I wasn’t born with one, but especially when I’m intimate with my partner and she moans aggressively, my phantom 12 inch horse vampire shlong starts to ache uncontrollably. Since I can’t cum all over her face, it does not stop until I piss all over her. Sometimes I’m reminded by her that she’s not real, and she’s only there because my parents don’t love me. However, she’s no phantom to me. Her love is more real than anything I could imagine.

I use an eggplant for reference, but I have to use duct tape to keep it in place.
Sucking her half veiny rod, half wishing well, is my favorite of course. I see her when I close my eyes, but when I open them, I only see my step dad. Still, he’s very good at pretending he’s her. I love it when he howls, but he makes me keep eye contact with him. He howls at my pee pee. I growl at his full moon.

Why does he shit on me though? And, why does he make me eat it afterwards? Is this normal for my other kin? I don’t want rice to be cooked in my anos anymore.

And my little brother watches from the toy chest as our step daddy lays his bricks in my mouth. Why does my mom insist on him using hot oil for the rice? I would like it if it were white rice.. but, it’s Uncle Ben’s. I hate Uncle Ben’s. My Uncle Ben actually made the recipe specifically for kinky anos cooking. He wanted all the flavor he could get, because, he too is a vampire. He loves skkaat play, but favors blood directly from the anul cavity. He is 4’11 and from the Philippines. He actually shaves so he can get on the school buses for free.

They think he’s actually a little Asian boy, because white people think we all look the same. He goes on the bus to find volunteers for his cooking skills.

Their innocence makes it to where the blood quality is a delicacy. I was his first volunteer. Unfortunately he used far too much paprika in the first batch, and it left my anul cavity sore for days.