I don’t see why people say liking Astolfo is gay. I mean I can like him like a bro, alright? Not getting in his fucking pants and push him down on his knee while I pound his smooth white ass. You know we could just chill around and go ride on his Gryphon or something, while chatting completely random stuff. Then on some Saturday night, we can sit down, watch some football and drink some beer, you know, like how bros do things. Then he strips down my pants, looking at my man thing and before I could say a word, he gulps down on it and it’s completely okay because he said no homo. Then I touch his skirt and pull it off, and we bang each other like drummer practice before is debut, you know, no homo, like how real man do things. How is that even gay?