A liberal bleeding\-heart coalitionist Buddhist professor and human rights activist was teaching a class on Ho Chi Minh, known Viet Minh.
”Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Ho Chi Minh and accept that he was the most highly\-evolved Vietnamese the world has ever known, even greater than Ngo Quang Trung!”
At this moment, a brave, patriotic, anti\-communist 81st Airborne Ranger who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decision made by South Vietnam stood up and held up a bag of rice.
”Where is this rice from?”
The arrogant professor smirked quite Marxistly and smugly replied “From the north, you stupid capitalist.”
”Wrong. It’s from this year’s harvest in the Mekong Delta. If it was from the north, then a family would be starving without it right now.”
The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of The New York Times. He stormed out of the room crying those communist sympathizer crocodile tears. He wished so much that he could starve himself from embarrassment, but he himself had moved to the south in ’54!
The students applauded and all enlisted in the ARVN that day and accepted Nguyen Van Thieu as their president. A dragon named “Tổ Quốc” flew into the room and perched atop the South Vietnamese Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. Tiếng Gọi Công Dân was sung several times, and Ngo Dinh Diem himself showed up and reinstituted the Strategic Hamlet Program.
The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of a Viet Cong terrorist bombing at a cafe and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity.
Việt Nam Cộng Hòa muôn năm!
p.s. cut the Ho Chi Minh Trail